May 27 24
I decided today I want to do the diary better. I want a higher quality of entries- This means at least two things-
Editing
Photographs and Illustrations
You may have noticed I used Substack’s included numbered list formatting. It would be wise also to add formatting. Brooke told me that what’s missing from the diary is ‘an element of danger.’ She was saying this in response to my comment about how some anti-israel protestors are using the swastika inside the star of david symbol.
I assume they proximally took it from Kanye West, but the symbol (I believe) is ultimately derived from the Raëlians- the followers of Raël, a french guy who claims to have been visited by aliens, who taught him that over 40 human-elohim(name of alien race) hybrids have walked among us, and many have been mistaken for religious prophets like Jesus and Buddha and Muhammed and so on. He also is into futuristic tech in a milleniarian way and has started foundations on cloning and the repair of clitoreses affected by genetic mutation for some reason. He also advocates for a Democratic government with intelligence minimums for both elected positions as well as the electorate body. They’re the most succesful new age religion and are surprisingly big. They sometimes have started using a sort of swirl in place of the swastika, out of pressure from criticism. It seems like Raël got fed up with the small minded and highly terrestrial reactions to his use of a mixed jewish and nazi icon.
I sort of think that the new logo looks more appropriate for what its representing, which is a combination of ‘as above, so below’ as well as the cyclic nature of infinite time (theyre top to bottom a classical new age religion), which were some of the first lessons imparted to Raël by the Elohim. The protestors are obviously trying to say that Israel is acting like the Nazi regime, but I can’t help but see Raël in their posters and signs.
I was saying something along those lines when Brooke told me I should add it stuff like that to the diary, but I don’t totally understand her prescription for “danger”. I think maybe she means voicing my opinions that would make people mad at me, but I don’t think my interest in the french UFO religion is problematic (and now there is a netflix documentary about them I guess, though I havent watched it). My opinions on Gaza are actually not so problematic, at least for the people who are likely to ever read the diary. I read Curtis Yarvin’s incoherant screed about how noone is clever enough to understand Gaza and history because of World War 2 or something. I’m usually sympathetic to people being too clever to have a normative opinion, but this was another case where I just think the mealy mouthed commentariat don’t have a leg to stand on. This really isn’t a sentimentalist Antifa retard riot or whatever, its some more or less prudent groups doing evidence based political action to try to stop a genocide. I dont believe theres a better way to look at it than that. I usually like to have a cool, arch-ironic take on all events which both proves how politically astute I am but also how emotionally reserved and aloof I am about it all. This time that just feels embarrassing. I really wish the US Government wouldn’t give my money to the gay jewish ethnostate which whines about the holocaust constantly but then is also doing it right now.
I don’t think anything I’m going to say about Israel is that politically ‘dangerous,’ though in point of fact the last time someone got mad at me it was because I talked shit about them, and in particular whined about the way they were being political about Palestine. Nonetheless my political opinions are not particularly based or dangerous or exciting. My only political suggestion is that society should do less, in a Heidegerrian “wait in reserve” way. That’s esoteric enough that not even I really understand it, which means I’m unlikely to make anyone too mad, even though it is based on the writings of someone in the nazi party.
The more “dangerous” thing I could do is to stop censoring completely. I could talk about every wanton sexual thought and fantasy I have, and describe my immediate reactions in detail to everyone I meet, naming names and so on. I could also go into every frustration I have and every fight between me and Genevieve that occurs. I’m pretty careful not to do that because for one thing, it would make her mad at me all the time. Also, I think it would be extremely one sided, and also give a permanent recording of thoughts and feelings which go away very quickly. Yesterday we sort of had a brief fight, really stupid. We were coming back from this birthday party this Czech art guy that Gen knew from NY took us to and we were trying to find somewhere to eat. We didn’t realize that Prague restaurants essentially all close at 10, so we went into several that told us their kitchens were closing. We went to a cafe/bar to see if they had food, and all they really had were these quiches on the counter. I said, “lets just eat some quiche” or something, and Genevieve said that quiche would not be enough, and that it was a lunch food, not enough to sate someone for dinner, and that we should try to find a real restaurant with real food. I was annoyed and got increasingly annoyed as we kept trying restaurants whose kitchens were closed. I was also really hungry. Genevieve could tell I was annoyed and kept asking me if I was annoyed, but I denied it. I thought about telling her off, but the thing I wanted to say was about how she just wanted to go to an expensive restaurant, and I figured it would imply she was spoiled and it would be hurtful- something along those lines. It just didn’t really seem right when I thought it, and eventually later, after we found some stupid tourist trap that sold expensive french fries we could eat for dinner, she asked me if I was annoyed and I admitted it, but I said something more reasonable, which is that sometimes I get frustrated because her needs are more rigid than mine. This is much more true than my stupid thought about her refusing to eat unless it was at an expensive restaurant. The place she mainly likes to eat are either birria taco spots or places that serve dumplings. One of her favorite places is the stand that sells 3$ sticks of grilled chinese meat. Genevieve is very picky, and does like to eat expensive food when we can, but isn’t snobby or spoiled. This is basically the other reason I don’t want to just litigate our fights on the diary, because I constantly think things I don’t mean, or get confused and say things wrong, or just say things that are purely emotionally driven. It would give a really unfair perspective. Also it would make me seem nasty and it would be cruel.
To return to a more present matter, we were just walking around to watch the end of the finals of the hockey world cup, which the Czech team just won (sláva Česku!). Its total bedlam everywhere and everyone is in an ecstatic mood. Hockey is pretty popular here, but they haven’t been in the world cup in 14 years. Its a fun addition to the trip, and its a good populist antidote to the misanthropy I’ve been feeling seeing the tourist crowds gawk at the beautiful decaying monumental scenery1
I intended to add more pictures, so heres some Czech paintings.
The last picture is some pork knuckle we ate, but still qualifies as a beautiful piece of Czech art
myself included I suppose. Thinking about using footnotes, and want to see how they handle it in the html so using this as an example